So my last article on the kinect and sex was just a little popular. In that spirit, let's continue on our merry journey through control controller sex, and revisit what's happened with the wiimote over the past few years.

Now, this journey has a goal. Mainly based on the Mojowijo. You see, the Mojowijo burst onto the scene back in August of 2010, and everyone hailed it as the next big thing.

The Mojowijo was apparently supposed to be the first and best wiimote sex toy, able to take the motion you make with one toy and transfer it to another, using the accelerometers in the toys and the bluetooth communication to turn what was a game controller into a teledildonics sensation.

Mojowijo

Even though it's not the first. It's been done. Multiple times. But, hey, that's fine, most people don't exactly keep up with sex toys like we here at slashdong do. It's what makes us better than the rest of you.

Anyways, the press flurry over something that's already happened is normal and we accept that, but then, there's this little extract off the mojowijo site...

Using Mojowijo's patent pending Motion2Vibration technology, the device is able to transform the varying motions of the control into appropriate vibration signals and send them to another selected device - in the same room or over the internet.

Waaaaaaaaaait a second. Patent pending? Seriously? 'cause, um, this has totally been done before. Whether that registers as prior art, I dunno, but, well, here's the history as I know it...

(And you're probably thinking, "Hey, qDot, didn't you already do almost this exact same article in 2008?", and you'd be right, but fuck you.)

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Picture it, Sicily^H^H^H^H^H^H The Internet, September 2005. Everyone was all freaking out because there was a new game controller out that wasn't a wiimote, and they're like all "hey, we can stick that in our hoo-hahs". And I was like, "no, look at the corners". So when I ended my kinect article with the "prove me wrong", well, this is why.

VGCats

(I would also like to say, 5 years later, that VGCats called it. So feel free to put that on your resume, Scott.)

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Wiibrator

Then in December 2006 we get the wiibrator. Created by Sam Hocevar, also the author of the incredibly useful libcaca and head of the debian project for a while.

The wiibrator used the Wiimote for control, and a trancevibrator for output. Whenever you made a jerking motion, like, say, in that whitest kids u know video I'm going to reference again because it's fucking hilarious...

Yeah, whenever you made that motion with the wiimote, the vibrator would vibrate. So, there's innovation number 1. I'd call that Motion2Vibration. However, it's also covered under the WTF License, meaning that it may not be covered as prior art. I'm not a lawyer. I'm just the dildo guy.

Maybe someday I could be the dildo lawyer.

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Mid 2007...

Wiildo

Someone buys the "Wiildo" domain. It goes nowhere. Domain is now dead.

Ciipote

Even the South Americans get into the idea, but still nothing.

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Sextrument

Late 2007, we move onto more artsy things. Elle Mehrmand's Sextrument, well, I'll just post the artist's description of the piece here:

A live durational performance where I masturbated for one hour, with a Nintendo Wii remote controller. The accelerometer sensor in the Wii-mote measured the speed and intensity of my hand movement, which sent messages to MaxMSP altering the sound of my voice, which was then projected through speakers outside of the room. Behind a locked door, I invited viewers to look through the peephole, seeing only the lower end of my breasts, down to the top of my pubic line, revealing the in-between.

So there was sex and accelerometer usage and even generative audio. Art!

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And then the only innovation we get for a while is a bunch of stupid youtube videos when you search for wii sex. Which by video view count, apparently a bunch of people do.

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WiibratorLink

Things go quiet until mid-2008, when we get the WiibratorLink, which eventually becomes the OIOO. Created by a student in Germany, this was a wiimote vibrator that used the same motion sensing idea as Sam Hocevar's wiibrator toy, except with a 3D printed exterior to make one end more insertable and the other more... Holable? Torusable? Whatever the word for the geometric quality of something you want to stick your cock in is.

WiibratorLink

The OIOO contained extra circuitry for driving a larger motor at different speeds, and eventually had full control and skype software developed for it, so you could use it in conjunction with the popular video/chat software. However, only 10 copies of the hardware were ever produced, and as they were as much art/collectors items as toys, they fetched a fairly high price. Still, this was probably the best iteration of the idea. Well designed, clean (before use), and innovative.

Now, the thing about the OIOO is that is was released in Germany, and therefore may not be covered by patent laws here in the US due to lots of legal issues that would probably make this article boring quickly. But once again, it still predates the Mojowijo by 2 years.

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And thus, we end up back the mojowijo. Which uses a motion idea someone came up with in 2006, a skype idea someone came up with in 2008, claims patents, credits neither.

Sounds like some shit to me.

Of course, Mojowijo's original release date was supposed to be something like last week, but has now moved to "late Spring 2011". I've watched many a toy slide into the vaporware hole before, so who knows if this'll even happen here. Maybe they'll release, maybe they won't get through the special hell that is the manufacturing process. They've already been enlisting porn stars to beta test their stuff. We shall see.

But now you're all up to date on the history of wiimote sex, and the future of kinect sex. I guess next up is PS3 Move Sex, which is going to take, some, uh, serious creativity on my part, 'cause I have no idea how that's gonna work, since I don't have a PS3, a Move, or much of an idea of how the system works outside of "pretty color changing led ball on wand". I'm sure I cam figure out something stupid to write about it.