Let's see what's been up on crowdfunding sites in the past couple of
months... Oh god. Oh my god.
Sometimes, the gods/goddesses/g*(various other genders) of the internet
looks down upon you and smile, and apparently that's what they're
doing today, 'cause hoooo boy do we got some campaigns. I just. Wow.
Starting with least interesting/already finished and progressing in
528% (US$76859 raised / US$20000 needed) - Campaign Over
Ok, posting this not because it's new, but because it just actually
shipped and backers have started receiving their hardware. They're
still $59 if you buy from Indiegogo, so get on that! Remember, if
you're interested in controlling it with your own code,
check out the liblovense library.
1982% (US$237851 raised / US$12000 needed) - Campaign Over
Charlie Sheen? Fucking really?
Lux Alptraum even
pulled her support for the condom
over their weird PR choices and lackluster initial reviews.
1229% (US$129804 raised / US$10000 needed) - Campaign Over
Eh. Toys seem kinda uninspired, and the PR is just fucking WEIRD.
"Make public sex legal!". It's kind of a combination of skeezy and
porn parody that just doesn't seem like it works.
Lux Alptraum included them in her article on why phone apps are a horrible idea,
which I highly recommend checking out. That said, $129000 (which isn't
actually all that much) says at least some people think it'll turn out
ok, so we'll see what happens when they ship.
0% (US$0 raised / US$10000 needed) - 30 days (?) left
Your standard onahole, with heating element. Nothing
Tenga hasn't done before. However, this image is
worthy of a toy that would show up on
Yeah. Um. Why is the onahole her whole digestive tract. WHY. EW.
0% (US$0 raised / US$50000 needed)
There's no pictures of what they're producing, just description of a
toy that acts like a tongue. There's a lot of those. I'm posting this
because of their opening image mostly, which is just... WTF.
0% (US$58 raised / US$64000 needed)
So Sir-Frots-A-Lot is ostensibly a good idea. It's a dual onahole for
pokey-thing/pokey-thing interaction. Made for two guys, but hey, you
could totally stick two Ambrosia toys in there and go to town, so who
knows. Has some interesting points about safe sex uses. But the
marketing. Christ, the marketing. I understand swordplay and all that,
That said, the fact that they're using diverse (in so many senses of
the word) fantasy art on their site is a surprisingly bold move.
I honestly feel like this could be a really interesting product if it
had better marketing behind it. Ah well.
0% (US$20 raised / US$150000 needed)
Is it like a thing now to get drunk and make crowdfunding campaigns? I
mean, I'm totally down with it if it is, it makes writing this post so
much easier. But my god, this one's a doozy. It's a "toy" that
measures how tight you are and gives you a score. They aren't stopped
"The Tight-O-Meter branding (T-O-M) will rely on various accesories to
hit the market and to be a worldwide success. T-shirts (the 1k
club;[ your ex..data, your next..data]; my gf is 850, T-O-M
entertainment for adults, T-O-M Æ For those who knows <--- mistake
voluntary), headbands, wristbands (600 blue;700 green;800 orange;900
silver;1000 gold), lubricants, cleaning wipes, etc."
YES THEY HAVE THEIR BRANDING PLANNED OUT.
"One day every pornstars, will have their own score. This way you
could have a realistic idea of the tightness of your favorite
In the future, everyone will be requires to have their tightness score
on their government issued ID. Societal castes will be set based on
Never stop dreaming, Tight-O-Meter Dude. And yes, I'm guessing you're
a dude but I'm pretty sure I'm right.